I’m not built for 6am. It’s as simple as that.

Jules up early this morning (as always) and as soon as he’s in bed with us there is zero chance that I’ll get back to sleep — he wiggles, he talks, Dee talks back, he wants a bottle, he wants the iPad. All I want is silence and darkness and a few more hours to myself.

Can’t have everything we want I suppose.

(I don’t actually believe that, if I’m honest. I usually DO get what I want, provided (a) it increases the sum total good in this Universe, and (b) I actually KNOW what I want. Case in point: Let’s say I want $50 million dollars (that’s a lot of zeroes), but is money what I *really* want? Or do I want fast cars, beautiful watches, an eco-house by the beach, freedom to travel the world, a bright & certain future for Jules, vintage motorcycles, a chance for a sleep-in, loads of gadgets and time & tools for hobbies?)

Sleep has been particularly disturbed of late, what with family visiting and Jules’ subsequent change of routine leading to inevitable night-time disturbance. He’s been okay (not great) going to bed, but almost always wakes and ends up in bed between us, which as mentioned is not a recipe for a restful night. Some of it is insomniac’s anxiety, I think: I’m worried I won’t get back to sleep, so I don’t.

Heading away to Jervis Bay for some R&R soon, so maybe that will be a chance to catch up?